The best word to describe passion is animalistic. It is sex that is a bit out of control. In modern western society, we spend years socializing our children out of animal-like behavior in order for them to behave. When the self-conscious part of your brain that tells you to be a good girl or boy…
Recognizing your sexual turn-ons help you identify what you want from your sexual interactions. Let’s start with romance. Most women are fed romantic movies throughout their entire life – starting from cartoon Cinderella and moving right on up to The Notebook. It is not surprising that most women respond in some way to romantic words…
It seems that everywhere we look we see couples in long term relationship suffering from challenges in their intimacy and sexual connection. More than half of all marriages end in divorce, and a large number of those who stay married report feeling dissatisfaction in their sexual and emotional connection. At the beginning of a relationship,…
We once worked with a couple who had been together for forty years and came to us desperate to reignite their spark. When we started engaging them in a dialogue about their favorite sexual acts Courtney volunteered, “One of my favorite things is having my toes sucked.” Her husband’s eyes widened. “We’ve been together for…
As this recent article on men’s experience of low sexual desire points out, women are not the only ones who suffer a lack of desire in their relationships. We see men in our practice suffering from low sexual desire for a number of reasons. Can’t Come Through with the Goods One of the main reasons…
In an earlier blog we talked about why it’s important to talk with your partner very specifically about your sexual desires. We can’t emphasize enough how essential talking about sex is if you want your sex life to last and be fulfilling. Yet, because of our society’s general shaming about sex, just talking about our…
Women, do you know what men do so much better than us overall? They shut out the rest of the world when it is time for sex! We women, on the other hand, can get very distracted during sex, which is one of the reasons that we don’t get aroused or have orgasms as easily….
The New York Times recently published an article on kissing where researchers tried to figure out exactly what role kissing plays in relationships. The problem with researchers is that their job is to study what is and not what can be… As sex and relationship coaches, we know that kisses are not all the same…
We love this Huffington Post article about why it is important to talk about sex. Firestone covers many of the conversations that you might want to have with your partner, but misses what we think is the most important one- what actually turns you on about sex. We don’t blame her because it just seems so…
Has your partner ever hinted at, suggested or asked for something sexual that seemed scarier than Camping at Crystal Lake with Jason? If so, we suggest you get into the Halloween spirit and consider that something new could turn out to be a Thriller instead of a Horror Flick. You might start by at least…
When people look to the experts for sex advice, they often imagine they are going to get a list of “hot tips” or techniques to “drive their partner wild”. After many years of working in the realm of sexual arousal, we have found that what really turns people has more to do with the energy…
If you think of boundaries as essential to love and intimacy, then offering a boundary is actually a gift. Unfortunately, usually when people share their boundaries, they feel like they are being selfish or will hurt their partner so they aren’t clear or they have waited and begun to build resentment and then theboundaries come out as harsh. Imagine the next…
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