people trying to recover from an affair

What it Takes to Recover From an Affair

ByDanielle Harel

When infidelity happens, couples are embroiled in feelings of hurt and anger as a result of the affair. Often, both partners are ashamed, not understanding how and why it happened to them, and not knowing what went wrong in their relationship.

Relationship coaching can help you recover from an affair – and create a deeper, more conscious connection with your partner. Here’s how.

How Relationship Coaching Paves the Way Back to Love

By the time a relationship coach enters the scene, the couple is generally already beaten down by the affair (or multiple affairs). They feel like they’re at the end of the road, and there is no way back from it.

Our culture emphasizes that an affair is the unforgivable sin, and encourages people not to forgive them to avoid future pain. The fact is that affairs happen, and often there is still a lot of love, connection, and strong feeling in the relationship that it is worth saving and rebuilding.

Affairs happen for many reasons (here’s why people have affairs). Relationship coaching helps you understand why it happened to you and your partner, and what the affair has to teach you about your needs.

Your coach guides you to recover from the deep hurt of the affair and connect to your partner again on a more intimate level. This can give you a deeper sense of who you are and what you need, and who your partner is and what they need.

While affairs hurt, they do not need to be the end of your relationship – but rather an invitation to start a different and deeper connection with your partner.

Couple connecting and recover from an affair

A Relationship Coaching Session Will Help You:

  • Understand why the affair happened
  • Overcome the shame of the affair
  • Heal together from the hurt of the affair
  • Understand what you need in your relationship and how to ask for it
  • Be able to be vulnerable and see your partner more clearly
  • Learn to accept yourself and your partner for who you are
  • Make your contract transparent so you can see and evaluate unspoken agreements

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Dr. Danielle Harel is the co-creator of the Somatica® Method, and the co-founder of the Somatica Institute. As a somatic sexologist and teacher, she has devoted the last twenty years to sex coaching and empowering couples, women, men, and groups. Danielle has published original research on Orgasmic Birth, and is the co-author of three books: Confidence, Making Love Real, and Coming Together.

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